Howe A-musing

Blogger's note: November 16: I wrote this 3 weeks ago.....though it sounds like just yesterday.

I have so many ideas running through my head...each blogworthy...so I am just going to run through them here.

Yesterday I was reading the thesaurus looking for just the right word. I started in the A s and was amazed at how many descriptive words there are for dispositions. In just the first 4 pages I came across abject, able, abnormal, abominable, aboveboard, abrasive, abrupt, absent-absentminded, absorbed, abstemious, abstruse, and absurd. Each of these words has approximately 15 entries --that's about 200 descriptive words. Who cares? you say. Well,I was so impressed at how many positive words there are--so many cheery, and glorious attributes that I decided that far too many of the negative downtrodden words were operating in my life. I'm going to give them all up. I think it is, after all, all about choice.

Choice? You know I always hated that quote from Abraham Lincoln. The one that goes something like this... "A man is just about as happy as he makes up his mind to be." NO, I would say. It's not MY fault that I am unhappy! I didn't DECIDE to be unhappy! But, again, I didn't decide to be Happy, either. And you know I think that it is easier to be unhappy than it is to be happy. Not better. But easier.

I mean think about it. It is so easy to be mad. It is so easy to be disappointed. It is so much easier to get angry than to keep your cool. It is easier to hate than to forgive. Get my drift? And it is easier to be lazy, than to make the effort to choose a response.

This has been a hard year for me, personally. I have learned a lot about making choices. And I have made some hard choices,all of which seemed to only have negative consequences. And I accept that. Instead of complaining incessantly--a very strong pull I feel--I have been learning how to choose to respond, or act. Not easy. I am not always successful. Sometimes I choose happiness for the wrong reasons--avoidance, say. But there are other reasons to choose happiness as a point of view. The obvious one is that you feel better being happy. Life goes along more easily. People enjoy being around you. It actually is more peaceful, and uses less energy. And it may just safeguard your health. Also, it feels good. And finding the good in something bad is just about the only compensation for having gone through an ordeal.

So, I'll let you in on the big secret....you can be Happy. In the middle of all the stress, the disappointments, the infuriatingly frustrating actions of others. Just shut that door, and open a new one. The stuff is all still there...it is true, but you can put it out of your mind, and function much better. This I know for sure.

I think I should have learned Meditation and the whole Zen thing when I was young. I'm sure it would have helped me enormously.